I need a change

I sense that there is something wrong with my thinking...
Perhaps I need to reflect upon myself and try my best to change it for the better...

During exam period, I was so focused on studying for the exam, only thinking about studies studies & studies.. My life and time spent back then only revolve around exams... I did try my best to enjoy the moment, to be grateful that I was granted high-class education along with internet, oversea experience, global friends and stuff like that...
Back then I was thinking: "Do not think so much about the uncertain future, just do your best and enjoy the moment! Try to picture yourself in a 3rd person view, and appreciate the moment..."
Now that exams all over, I have nothing to do....
I am now like a lost child in the lonely desert with no directions...

I was so distracted by the thoughts of exam back then that i have no plan or whatsoever after the busy exam period.... Now that holidays are here, I'm not too sure of what to do, or what can I do... My passion and motivation were all invested in the exam. Now that its gone, so does my motivation...

I'm not sure if you guys understand what i'm trying to express, but I just don't feel like doing anything. I have nothing to look forward to for the time being... I don't feel like going out, I don't feel like learning a new skill, I don't feel like sleeping, I don't feel like doing anything at all!!!!
Heck, I don't even feel like breathing... Well, luckily its all controlled by our sub-conscious mind. If not, it'll be such a bruden to control such basic essential routine bio-human work.

Perhaps this is a glimpse of how drug-addicts and hardcore criminals, people with no future feels like.... A bunch of carefree zombie with nothing to look forward to...
I have to change my mindset fast!!! Gotta find a source of motivation soon....

Oh well, I guess that is why the luckiest among people are those surronded by a wall of active friends, always having some activity going around with other people....
(I sure hope someone calls me out or something like that....)

By the way, did you know that I'm have this fear of calling other people??
That's why I seldom use the phone.... Receiving calls are ok to me. But making a call is scary to me... (Probably because I feel that I'm not a quick-wit smooth-talker...)
Damn, I'm weird!!!