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25 September 2007

Mid Autumn Festival 2007

25th of September 2007....
Today is the day when people all around the world gather in small groups patrol around the neighborhood with their lantern. Like a werewolf, they seemed to obtain their power from the lucent moon. With mooncake as their rations and their energy source, most of these small groups would walk around indefinitely terrorizing anyone with their lantern until they run out of mooncakes or until the sun rises whichever comes first. Mostly they would demand an early Ang Pao for Chinese New Year. And if they don't get what they want, they are gonna start an urban fire with their deadly petrol-powered lanterns.

Don't be fooled by appearance, though they may dressed in slippers, really short pants and a hawaii-shirt, these small group of people are in fact technologically advanced! They have simple minded weapons capable of bringing death to a few hundred people. For example, They have the resources to construct a 'Kong Ming Lantern', a paper-like zeppelin [Its like a parachute, with a candle of fire lit below the paper to allow the paper to float above the air]. This simple mechanism can bring down a plane causing terror to the plane passengers as well as the dwellers on land where the plane will be crashing. The most horrifying thing is that this 'Kong Ming Lantern' only takes 5mins to construct by 1 person and it cost less than a dollar. With the whole night to spare and a bunch of small lil kids, who knows how many of these paper zeppelin they are planning to release tonight.

If thats not bad enough, some of these groups have adults who would advice them where to get free candy. These adults pretend as if they are there to take care of the group. He/She would even go as far as making sure that the group stays safe on the road. Don't be fooled by the adult. They are the mastermind behind these acts of terror!

Fear not as judgment day will not be tonight. If you've read Sun-Tzu Art of War, you would be familiar on ow to deal with these kind of situations. It was a wide known fact that in order to crush an army, you have to deal with the person in command. Bring him down, and the whole army crumbles.

If you are way too ambitious or way too paranoid, you can always gather a few million friends, sign a petition and convince Bush to launch a nuclear bomb to the moon disintegrating it. Doing so would strip off their motivation to terrorize and put an end to all these nonsense.

By the way, I wrote this post on a broad daylight. Meaning I had the influence of the sun in my favour. The moonlight is evil I tell you. Its beaming ray has the potential to change a person's personality in an instant turning them into seemingly romantic people. [I came to this conclusion while looking back at my previous post which is sentimental in nature.]

Moral of the story, Stay in bed tonight! Going out is gonna turn you into something worse than a werewolf. A werewolf usually threatens an individual. But a 'Lantern' gang threatens the whole city! If you have watched the show 'Resident Evil 2', you should know how devastating it is to allow small groups of mindless zombies running around the city. Do not let fantasy repeat itself, Learn from the show and do not give in to any evil residents!

8 comments:

Nux V said...

huh? stayin' at bed? tis is all so BORING...Nope, i m gonna sneak out and seek for some adventures..wish me luck...wuahaha

btw, happy Mid-Autumn to u ;P

Bengbeng said...

Love the way you wrote this post. Informative and yet fun post .Happy mooncake festival to u :)

socrates rudy sirait said...

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival.Thanks for visiting my blog.

Johnny Ong said...

was thinking of blogging abt this...... and then was thinking of taking pictures of mooncakes ......

till now, still thinking

Princess Eileen said...

I had a peaceful mooncake festival :P

3POINT8 said...

[Nux]
Seek out some adventure eh? Did you manage to encounter one?

[bengbeng]
Thank you for the compliment! I'll come out with more informative yet funny post!

[Socrates]
No worries! Thank you for commenting in my blog!

[Johnny Ong]
Don't think! Just do it!

[Princess Eileen]
Oh? A peaceful mooncake festival? How did that happen? I can't believe it! The world is getting more and more peaceful!

Jade Z. said...

wahhhhhh ~ are you trying to scare small kids like me ? hahaha !

but it does sound scary now ... until u have to blog during the day . >.<

3POINT8 said...

[Jade z.]
Small kids like you? You don't look like a small kid at all. Well, if you are scared by this post, maybe you are a small kid after all. Hehe... (Don't whack me!!) :D